On Tuesday, June 2, 2026, CREW Boston hosted its Annual Meeting & June Luncheon Program at the Boston Harbor Hotel, featuring Dr. Pooja Lakshmin, psychiatrist, speaker, and bestselling author of
Real Self-Care.
Annual meeting business included the election of four new members to the Board of Directors: Joanna Hilvert, BioMed Realty; Joanna Hunt, Baker Tilly US, LLP; Robina Shepherd, Margulies Perruzzi; and Alexandra Toteva, Harvard Allston Land Company. CREW Boston also recognized and thanked outgoing board members Judy Cazeau, Shelly Gouin, Erin Harvey, Gretchen McGill, and Colleen O'Connor for their years of dedicated leadership and service to the organization.
As her year as 2025–2026 President comes to a close, Kate Carter reflected on the power of participation, connection, and community, encouraging members to continue creating opportunities by showing up, volunteering, building relationships, and embracing new experiences. She then welcomed incoming President Amy Prange to the podium. Amy shared her enthusiasm for leading the organization in the year ahead and introduced Emily Paparella of Elkus Manfredi as President-Elect for the 2026–2027 term. Together, they expressed their commitment to fostering opportunities for connection, mentorship, professional growth, and friendship throughout the CREW Boston community.
The keynote, Real Self-Care: Reclaiming Agency and Redefining Wellness for High-Achieving Women, challenged attendees to rethink self-care as something deeper than wellness trends, consumer habits, or surface-level practices.
Dr. Lakshmin shared her personal story as the eldest daughter of Indian immigrant parents, raised with a clear expectation to become a doctor. She followed the traditional path of achievement—elite education, medical school, and psychiatry residency—but eventually realized she had built a life around external validation rather than her own values. After a personal crisis, she left her marriage and residency, lived on a commune for two years, and ultimately returned to medicine with a clearer understanding: true well-being cannot be outsourced to a guru, product, practice, or checklist.
The central distinction was between faux self-care and real self-care. Faux self-care is often something bought or performed, such as yoga, massages, journals, or wellness products. While these may be enjoyable, they do not necessarily change the underlying dynamics causing stress or burnout. Real self-care, by contrast, is rooted in agency, values, boundaries, and difficult decision-making. It requires honest reflection, communication, and the willingness to shift power dynamics at home, at work, and within systems.
A key theme was the importance of pausing before automatically saying yes. Boundaries do not always start with saying no; they begin with creating space to decide whether to say yes, no, or negotiate. For high-achieving women who are often managing careers, households, relationships, and community expectations, this pause is essential. Without intentional reflection, decisions are often made by employers, families, culture, or guilt.
Dr. Lakshmin also emphasized that real self-care is not only personal but collective and systemic. Its roots are tied to social justice movements, particularly the work of Audre Lorde, and to psychiatry, where small acts of autonomy mattered even within restrictive systems. Real self-care can lead to broader change, as demonstrated by individuals advocating for mental health leave, paternity leave, and healthier workplace norms.
The keynote also explored the tension between competence and vulnerability in leadership. Women, especially millennials, are uniquely positioned to bridge generational attitudes around mental health and boundaries. By modeling vulnerability, they can build trust and create space for younger women to see a future where professional success and personal well-being can coexist.
Attendees also received a copy of Dr. Lakshmin's bestselling book Real Self-Care, with many members taking advantage of the opportunity to meet the author and receive signed copies following the program.
Key Takeaways
1. Real self-care is not the same as wellness culture.
Massages, yoga, journaling, crystals, skincare, or gratitude practices can be helpful, but they are not real self-care if they simply maintain the same stressful patterns.
2. Faux self-care is something you buy or do; real self-care is something you embody.
Real self-care is rooted in values, boundaries, agency, and hard decision-making.
3. True well-being cannot be outsourced.
No guru, diet, product, app, book, or wellness trend can replace the work of understanding what you actually want and need.
4. High-achieving women are especially vulnerable to outsourcing decisions.
Many women are managing careers, households, families, relationships, and community expectations. When there is no time to pause, decisions are often made by others: employers, family, culture, guilt, or social pressure.
5. The pause is the beginning of a boundary.
A boundary does not always have to be an immediate "no." It can begin with pausing long enough to choose: yes, no, or negotiate.
6. Negotiation is a form of self-care.
Asking questions, clarifying expectations, proposing alternatives, or naming what support you need are all practical forms of real self-care.
7. Real self-care often creates discomfort before it creates relief.
It may involve guilt, hard conversations, disappointment, or fear of being judged. That does not mean it is wrong; it often means you are shifting an old pattern.
8. Self-care is not only personal; it is systemic.
When individuals advocate for mental health leave, paternity leave, better workplace norms, or healthier expectations, they create pathways for others.
9. Competence and vulnerability can coexist.
Being honest about boundaries or mental health does not make someone less capable. It can make leaders more trustworthy, relatable, and inclusive.
10. Women in leadership can model a healthier version of success.
Younger women need to see leaders who are successful, honest, human, and not completely depleted.
11. Small decisions can lead to larger change.
Real self-care starts with small choices, but over time those choices can shift family dynamics, workplace culture, and broader systems.
12. A practical starting point is a weekly review.
Spend 30 minutes each week noticing what drained you, what energized you, which meetings were valuable, and where you automatically said yes.
13. Another practical starting point is practicing the pause.
Pick one day a week to pause before responding to requests. The goal is not to say no to everything, but to become aware of your automatic responses.
14. For entrepreneurs and solopreneurs, doing everything at 100% is not sustainable.
Growth requires prioritizing, outsourcing where possible, and accepting that different stages of business require different levels of care.
15. Real self-care is strategic, not selfish.
It helps women reclaim agency, make values-based decisions, lead with more clarity, and create healthier systems for others.
As the program concluded, attendees were reminded that self-care is not practiced in isolation. Fellowship—the bonds formed through community, connection, and shared experience—is an important part of well-being. At its core, CREW Boston exists to bring women together across all sectors of commercial real estate to meet, connect, support one another, and foster a sense of belonging. Those relationships strengthen both individual resilience and the collective power of the community.
